Martyrdom by Excess

I had a great Valentine’s Day this year. I know it’s not fashionable to get into this holiday, “hallmark created”, empty materialistic gesture, and all that. But really, Hallmark just capitalized on an already existing ancient materialistic gesture. And we all know, if something’s really old, then it’s valid. Dust adds worth. (this is what I tell myself about my house all the time)
This year, S. and I went on the Cuyahoga Valley Scenic Railroad Wine Express. I love trains, and I love wine. We got coach, because first class was sold out by the time we bought tickets. I guess the Wine trains normally sell out months in advance. So we were sitting knee to knee with these two computer programmers from Aurora, who were visibly wary of us when they first sat down. They were both wine tourists, the kind of people who go to every festival and have been to lots of wineries, and have their own wine cellar, ect. So we coddled them with lots of wine questions, and once they saw we weren’t going to be gulping and shouting for refills, or lighting a joint with the riffraff in the next seat over, they relaxed and we all had a decent time. They were nice people, and of course, everyone's nicer when you're drinking. I was definitely tipsy by the time I got off, tipsy enough that I didn’t want to wear coat in the stupid cold Cleveland darkness. It was a lot of fun, if only for the whole novelty of it, and I want to go on the South American Wines trip this spring, but I think I want to be a little more sure of my traveling companions if I’m not in first class. So some of you are going to have to come with me. Cause I'm not sitting next to Mr. Hair Gel and Ms. Tasteless Leather Jacket. We totally lucked out this time, but I don't trust luck twice ever.

After the train, we stopped by Asterisk to see CB’s friend Rob’s exhibit. It was suitably impressive. I drank more wine there, and wished I had more money to buy artsy stuff. Then it was a brief stop at Lava, with more wine there. And finally a late night stumble into Tremont Taphouse, where I stupidly thought short rib sliders and a pineapple vodka would sit well on what, 8?, glasses of red wine? Because I am easily influenced by meat.

How I rolled out of bed the next morning is still not fully understood. I do know that I got out of the house on time, only to be thwarted by the slipperiest inch of snow ever to fall on Cleveland. I counted 7 car accidents on 480 on the way there, and I was 30 minutes late, which sucked.

For actual Valentine’s Day, we just stayed home watching Serpico and Arrested Development. I made dinner, and here you go, you can make it yourself. It was pretty satisfying. I tried to stay really simple when I picked out the recipes, because I knew my eyes would be rolling in the back of my head by the time I got home from work. The corn bruschetta was awesome, and I loved the rub on the steaks. S. liked the squash, but it was a little too punch out parmesan for me, I tend to like squash with a sweet aftertaste. We had a decent Malbec with everything, and then sparkling Shiraz with dessert, which I totally just bought from the store, because I’m a pastry pussy. If I could, I would buy you all a bottle of Shingleback Sparkling Shiraz, it’s SO good, and it goes really well with dark fudgy chocolate (the thing I bought was called a Chocolate Bomb, and was basically a round of dark chocolate cake with fudge on top, and then covered with a chocolate shell. There’s no way I will EVER be making something that good.) If I bought you all bottles though, I would then lose my apartment. So get it yourself.

Sage Creamed Corn Bruschetta with Prosciutto – recipe from Michael Chiarello (from Foodnetwork.com)

•1 tablespoon unsalted butter
•2 garlic cloves, sliced (I have this giant jar of minced which I’m going through surprisingly fast, and I used about 2 teaspoons. It went a long way.)
•6 sage leaves (yes, I also have no idea what this translates to for dried ground sage. Apparently the internet does not know either. So I used about a teaspoon of this too.)•4 ears corn, kernels removed (I used frozen, it was fine)
•Salt and pepper
•1/2 cup heavy cream
•Slices of grilled bread (I used a baguette and immediately regretted not having more surface area)
•About ½ pound of shaved prosciutto

Directions

In a skillet over medium-high heat, lightly brown the butter. Add the garlic and cook until it is light brown. Add the sage and cook until aromatic. Add the corn kernels and cook for 1 minute. Season with salt and pepper. Pour in the cream and simmer until it is reduced by half, about 4 to 5 minutes; let cool. Spoon the corn over the bread and serve with a slice of prosciutto on each.

Butternut Squash With Thyme and Parmesan – recipe from Rachel Ray ( from hell…or foodnetwork.com…or Canada…take your pick)




•1/2 cup chicken broth
•2 boxes, 10 ounces each, frozen cooked butternut squash puree (I used chunked squash cause I couldn’t find puree, and just let it cook in the broth like ten times longer than she probably meant)•2 tablespoons chopped fresh thyme leaves
•Salt and pepper
•1/2 cup Parmesan

Directions

In a medium pot, bring chicken stock to a simmer over medium heat. Add frozen cooked squash and cook together until squash is warmed through and loose. Stir in thyme, salt and pepper and cheese and cook over low heat to combine flavors, serve.

Mexican Spice Rubbed Rib Eyes with Lime Butter – recipe by Bernie Kantak (from Foodandwine.com)



1. 4 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened
2. 1 small garlic clove, minced
3. 1/4 teaspoon finely grated lime zest
4. 1 tablespoon fresh lime juice
5. Kosher salt
6. 1 1/2 teaspoons sweet paprika
7. 1 1/2 teaspoons ground cumin
8. 1 1/2 teaspoons chipotle powder (chipotle powder is surprisingly hard to find in Cleveland, go fig. So I had to substitute a chipotle blend, which usually has paprika in it but just for coloring. So you know, eye it. You really want a little more chipotle than paprika, if you can’t get it exactly balanced.)
9. Four 12-ounce, 1-inch thick, boneless rib eye steaks (I only made two steaks of course, so use the rub and butter proportionately. I also got this awesome aged Delmonicos, but that’s cause I go overboard when it comes to meat. Please recall Valentine’s Day 2007 when I bought 4 inch thick stegosaurus steaks. Each one was the size of my head.)
10. Vegetable oil, for the grill

DIRECTIONS

1. Light a grill or preheat a grill pan. In a small bowl, combine the butter, garlic, lime zest, lime juice and a pinch of salt. In another bowl, combine the paprika, cumin and chipotle powder with 1 1/2 teaspoons of kosher salt. Rub the mixture all over the steaks.

2. Oil the grate and grill the steaks over moderately high heat, turning once, until slightly charred and medium-rare, about 12 minutes. Transfer the steaks to plates and top with the lime butter. Let the steaks stand for 3 to 4 minutes before serving.(but don't do like I did, and decide to make out while the steaks are resting, cause then you'll end up with overcooked Delmonicos. Shame Shame.)

And here's is my not very pretty photo of a very good plate. Please note the almost empty plate of bruschetta in the background.