Sunday, January 3, 2010

Ask me more questions so I don't have to wash my kitchen floor.

Why are lasers hot.

There are two answers to this.

1. Lasers are hot because they are focused light, which produces heat. I have no idea if this is true because I'm not a laser scientist. I don't even know what the correct title for a laser scientist is. If I met one in real life, I would probably want to fuck them, because a)they have a much cooler job than me, and b)hopefully make more money than me. Also, some lasers are not hot? I think? I mean, don't they shine them in your eyes and stuff? And there's things called laser pointers, which don't slice up the conference room as you wave them around. I've been to laser shows, and though at the time I may have been convinced I was being cut open, I'm pretty sure I wasn't. Once I went to a laser show in Toronto call The Flight of the Loon. Canada is fucked up sometimes. I bet they have a whole arsenal of lasers pointed right at us, just in case. I bet laser pointers and laser shows and shit aren't real lasers at all. I bet we're all being taken in by cat toys.

2) Lasers are hot because they convince us we're making progress.

Ask me anything

3 comments:

  1. They're also hot because they can pretty much destroy your eyes. Just from being "on" ....and pointed at your retina...

    A microwave can't even do *that*

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hahah! You totally reminded me of my trip to Toronto in junior high school. We went to a laser show...

    and it was themed to Def Leppard music. Awesome.

    ReplyDelete

Who wants to fuck the Editors?