HAPPY WU YEAR

Well, my laptop is officially dead, so no pictures yet, because my cords at my house, a place I have not been in a week and at this point have started to think of as a happy fantasy I dreamed about. Possibly at the same time I dreamed I was chewing a car and woke up chewing S.'s back. That did happen this week. Also:

- we listened to every classic rock station from here to Maryland. Because our options were classic rock, country, or bible passages.
- we survived gale force winds (they actually cancelled the Baltimore harbor fireworks, the wind was so bad)
- we survived the Polar Express 4d experience at the Baltimore aquarium (only one kid cried).
- we spent the first fifteen minutes in our hotel room taking pictures of the view
- I got so drunk on free liquor at Sonar that apparently my jeans picked up a vomit smell and I didn't notice. Also I made friends with half of the bouncers and the coat check girl. And some girl with a leopard print tattoo decided I was her new best friend, and screamed every time she saw me. I'm apparently instantly charismatic.
- Wu Tang took an hour to come on after they were announced. When they did finally come on, they were followed by three very bored looking not very hot girls who just stood on stage texting the whole show.
- One of the guys up on stage with them (don't know his name) was outside the show previously, and S. spotted him hawking tickets.
- Wu Tang Clan ain't nothing to fuck with.
- Method Man took a serious dislike towards S., and proceeded to scream unintelligible things at him from the stage. This is after Method decided to try crowd surfing and got promptly dropped on the floor. But not by us, much to the right of us. Maybe he though S. was his agent, and he was pissed off about that failed sitcom still? Edit: looking for some youtube footage of that night, I found three other videos featuring Method Man failing at stage diving. You think he would just give up at this point?
- Oh, Rza is hot. And Ghostface had this awesome letter jacket with Ghost across the back of it in sequins.
- New Years Day we woke up and I promptly had a hangover/blood sugar breakdown, and cried until we found me some crabcakes.
- I saw Rocky for the first time.
- Then he snuck me into West Virginia, to the casino, and I won 377 on the first slot machine I sat down to. I actually won another 250 later on the same machine, but S. was in the poker room, so I blew it all on the same machine, convinced it would pay out for me again. However I smartly gave the 300 to S. for safekeeping, so I still managed to pay for my entire trip. I say that like I did something for it, ha! There were lots of old people there eating giant waffle ice cream cones and blowing hundreds and hundreds on the 2 cent slots.
- We saw the World's Largest Teacup.
- We crossed the Bridge to Hell, into E. Liverpool Ohio, where we then saw a giant cross outlined in red Christmas lights on a hillside.

So yeah, Happy New Year! Mine was everything I wanted it to be, and my bloodstream is still, at least, 50% pineapple and vodka. I would go home now, where my poor kitty is still waiting for me, but S. took off for an appointment with my car keys still in his glove box. So I'm just gonna sit here and watch Bravo and drink hot chocolate till my eyeballs swim. The End.