Friday, March 19, 2010

Ain't No Thing

Is it wrong to post a picture of a collage you gave to someone as a present? Does it take away of the value of the present? I prefer to think that in fact it increases the value, because now you are all jealous of my mad collage making skills and the fact that you can never ever have this ever.

What are "things"? An inanimate object. A material possession? An emotional construct regarding a subject in your mind? A large slimy sloth creature slouching towards Metairie LA with the head of a snapping turtle and the body of an obese camel?

This thing, this vague nebulous word used to describe social contracts, pet peeves, bicycles, monsters, unknown objects, asexuals, forbidden fruits, and moldy sandwiches, this word is crawling across our language. In its wake, the littered corpses of proper nouns and NOT ONE SINGLE FACEBOOK FAN PAGE FOR "THINGS". Fix this, my minions. I want to be a fan of Things.

God, if you give me minions, I promise to never yell at my sister again.

Here are some Things:

Thing 1

Thing 2

Thing Red

Thing Blue

Addictive Thing

Amazing Thing

Pretty Thing

It's Open Window Time! Let the Killing Halt!


  1. The squirrel. In the bathtub. Oh dear god, my brain just melted from the EXTREME CUTE.

    I am going to go stare at that photo some more now.

  2. There is now a group called Things on Facebook. I can't believe I'm the one that started it though because you'd think someone would have jumped on that long ago. But noooooooooooooo. It was me. Is this caving to peer pressure?

  3. This is you being Awesome. I will remember this if I ever take over the world.

  4. Oh good! I'm not the only one that can't stop looking at those squirrels. I printed one out and put it on the fridge. It's making my husband crabby. Boys are dumb.

  5. I am sorry I inflicted the squirrels on you. It's my friend Marty's fault. Blame him for all future marital issues.

  6. will have to make sure @kittenkaboo checks these out cus she is terrified of squirrels.



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