Saturday, July 3, 2010

Fridays Questions woke up late and are making up lame excuses for standing you up

Can you explain to me why people who didn't give a shit about soccer two months ago are now watching it and talking about it like they've been dedicated pseudo-European fans their whole lives?

No. I'd like to know what's gonna happen if America really really gets into soccer, and then has to start calling it football like the rest of the world? Are we going to rename football? This is exactly why we stayed away from this sport in the first place, and now we're gonna have to deal with the consequences. Think of the fans man. What are we going to call American football? I vote for War. Or Murder Games.

Do you think our generation is really more selfish? or is it just a stereotype assigned to us that we will eventually live up to?

I don't buy into the whole" one generation is better than the other" crap. Human nature doesn't change, only what kinds of jobs and governments and past times we have. If our forefathers had the same access to the 24 hour online monologue that we do now, they would be doing the exact same thing. But they didn't have the internet, and what the internet is really good at doing is exposing the details of a person that beforehand you might have only found out after years of marriage. So now, instead of being able to control our social images with a few well placed words after church, we all know how selfish, stupid, shallow, sad, and sophomoric we are, actually.

I ,for one, welcome this age of personality porn. It makes it much easier to decide who's worth sleeping with and I no longer have to remember everyone's address.

Can you list your top 5 favorite things to do during summer in Cleveland?

1. Watch thunderstorms
2. Drive out and explore the rest of Ohio
3. Sleep in front of a fan
4. Watch fireworks
5. Hang out by the lake and drink

How's come so many folks from Cleveland seem to work from home?

Do we? I don't know anyone else who does. Maybe you are just basing this off the Cleveland blog population? Of course people who work from home are more inclined to have blogs.

Maybe by "work from home" you mean desperately unemployed? That would make more sense.

If he reads my blog a lot, it means he likes me, right?

Ha! Probably. I've never dated anyone who read my blog on a regular basis. And I take that to heart. It's insulting. I mean, why are you asking me in person about my day? Did you not read about it? So yes, he may like you a lot. Or he may just like your writing. Or he may really enjoyed reading about banal details. It means less that he's romantically inclined, and more that if he is, he's okay for you. But not entirely. Cause some people are just really bored at work. Also, how many other blogs is he really into reading, huh? Is he a blog playa? And what do you talk about exactly, cause if your blog is entirely about reality television, you may want to think twice anyway.

Do you think that alcoholics should have dogs?

What level of alcoholic are we talking about? Cause anybody that can't be bothered to come home to walk the dog, or spend time playing with the dog, or brush the dog and take the dog to the vet and be home with the dog should not have a dog. I think that generally rules out most alcoholics. That even rules out me and I'm not an alcoholic despite what my mother thinks. But if you are an alkie who's devoted entirely to their dog as some sort of coping mechanism with the outside world, and I have met these guys who take better care of their dog than themselves, well you've got other problems, but me taking away your dog isn't one of them. Better you concern yourself with animal friends than involving yourself in anyone else's life emotionally. Oooh, burn.

Ask Me Anything, except maybe wait till I'm over this hangover.

(stolen from David, who may or may not have stolen it from elsewhere cause he's so fucking indie it hurts)


  1. but what if when he comes home he brings some hooch for the pooch?

  2. Pooches should not be drinking hooches.


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