By now you've heard about North Carolina passing a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage yesterday.
I am moving to North Carolina in the fall, and the result of this amendment passing was a bunch of texts and facebook comments from my friends saying things like "nascar! country music! awful awful terrible place!"
And then there were 8 hours of posts about stupid bigoted hick NCers. And THEN (because this is how the social media cycle works) there was an hour of reactionary "wait a second, stop judging a whole state like that".
This is one of the latter. Stop judging a whole state because they passed a crazy awful evil law, OHIO. Remember how this state also voted down gay marriage just a few years ago OHIO? Remember how we then elected a crazy tea bag governor who is anti-union, anti-choice, anti-public employees, anti-public transportation, and pro-fracking, OHIO? Remember how we haven't even impeached him yet, unlike Wisconsin which is slowly getting it's shit together regarding Walker? Stop throwing rocks at glass houses Ohio.
And stop telling me that my chosen future place to live is going to be awful and I'm going to be surrounded by hicks and just hate every minute of it. I live in Ohio. I KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE BEING SURROUNDED BY HICKS. I am very well aware of what it's like to live in a place where only 42% of the population is sane. What you should be saying to me instead is "Hey, good, we're glad you're moving to North Carolina because then that will be one more sane person there who can push other people to be sane too."
Mostly, stop being assholes. You don't convert people to your point of view by being assholes and calling them names. Has that worked on you? Has the Right Wing calling you all bleeding heart idiot godless heathen sluts made you see the light up the elephant's ass? Or has it only stoked the hatred between the two camps, so that instead of reasoned arguments, or even emotional pleas, we only vomit vitriol at each other?
It is frustrating beyond belief to me when people throw away decorum, politeness, and most importantly cultural and political strategy, so they can type in all caps. If you really want to have any effect on this new law, then move to North Carolina with me and establish residency. Or stay here. Whatever. As far as I can see, culturally, North Carolina is pretty much going to be exactly like Ohio, and I did pretty well here, so I'm not worried. Places like these don't change by encouraging everyone to run away and making fun of the ones who stay.
It's a beautiful state, one of my favorite places in the world is there, and you'll be fine. I know a lot of people Like Us that live there.
ReplyDeleteIt's a shitty amendment that wasted a lot of everyone's time that could have been spent fixing something important, but I guess this is what we do now.
Like you said, not so different from home sweet home!
Great post. I live in the triangle area (Raleigh-Durham-Chapel Hill), which is one of the most progressive areas in the entire COUNTRY. Our county was one of the only 7 (out of 100!) that voted this shit down. I've lived in Wash. DC, Virginia, Los Angeles, Miami, San Francisco, Cleveland, and briefly in Toronto, and I'll probably never leave this area. I hope stereotypes about NC can be broken by the people and culture I am part of here; it's a great mix of south and north, with bright minds (research/medical/education) and progressive social agendas. Within 30 minutes of one another there are Duke University, University of North Carolina, and NC State University. Although I'm quite broken over what went on last night, like you say, 30 STATES already have had this ban, so everyone that is talking shit, needs to at least know they may be living in one of those states. Thanks for standing up for a place some of us actually love, despite its shittier sides.
ReplyDeleteI said your last post was my favorite. I retract that statement in light of this one (even if they are totally different in content, form & delivery). I have a liberal friend that just moved to Ohio, so his sanity will equal out the loss of yours in the Fall...and all will be right with the world. ha.
ReplyDeleteit is so very Ohio to vote down gay marriage!
ReplyDeleteIllinois is "blue" only because of the city of Chicago. During every election, if you look at the map of distribution, you see one blue dot surrounded by a sea of red. I love how you are prepared to be the shining beacon in that state. I know one lady who lives in North Carolina who is part of a group of intelligent, liberal women writers.
ReplyDeleteI agree with everything said here and I'm sorry everyone gave you all that grief, but I still hate giving up our Bridget Callahan and I'm still probably going to clasp your ankle and cry "don't go don't go don't go" when the time comes.
ReplyDeleteBut I hope you love NC like crazy and fish out Pruteanu at some point and take pix of the two of you throwing back martinis to post on Mr. Gore's interwebs.