Sunday, February 20, 2011
Ad From My Facebook Page and Why It Reflects the Vast and Unspeakable Confusion That is the Universe
“Like” us and next time you catch a guy checking you out at the bar he’ll be begging to buy you another HPNOTIQ cocktail!
Like · 41,802 people like this.
1) Live Louder does not make any sense. All of evolution should teach us to be quieter, so we don't get eaten by bears or raped by nomadic hunters. Even in the context of this ad, which one presumes takes place in a modern day W.6th with much less bears and rape, it still doesn't make sense to be louder because that's how you get arrested and/or noticed by the guy who sees how drunk you are and steals your purse.
2) The name is misspelled. In a way that makes me think it is a computer product.
3) From wikipedia - "Hpnotiq was created by Raphael Yakoby in 2001, a college dropout living with his parents in Long Island, New York, who, after seeing a blue perfume at Bloomingdale's, decided to create a blue liqueur"
4) I think it goes without saying that "liking" something on facebook isn't going to ensure the kind of drink a guy buys you at the bar, unless of course that guy has been stalking you for months, and has written down every single thing you've "liked" ever. Hint: If he starts talking about how great Darkwing Duck was, and how he really likes "not letting bitches keep you down", run.
5) There are 41,802 people in this world who I know I definitely never want to meet ever under any circumstances, unless I'm looking to buy an 8ball or an underage New Jersey hooker.
6) Technically, a bottle of fruit juice, vodka, and cognac already is a cocktail. If you make another cocktail out of the first cocktail, then you have a punch. True.
Posted by Bridget Callahan at 12:36 PM