And This is Why You Need to Make Sure Your Elected Officials Don't Hire Their Nephews

Interpretation has been on my mind lately. How people interpret text messages. Facial expressions. Pizza preferences. I've been reading an essay about the emergence of neural imaging technology, and also that idea that we are genetically programmed to be certain things and ways, and there is no escaping from where evolution has placed us on the skills ladder. For instance, are you pre-programmed genetically, instead of culturally, to place all your pens in a certain order on your desk? Or to be in a service industry instead of manufacturing? Or, and here's the really awful part of where I'm going here, liberal or conservative?

The reason I bring this all up will become clear once you watch the video below.



I have a lot of questions about this. And also some statements.

Wait, did you watch it? Cause if you didn't, there's really no point in continuing to read this. I mean, I know, I skip a lot of videos too. But it's pretty integral to what I'm writing here.

Alright.

First of all, King Roy the Rat King is deceptively cute and mouse-like. This seems like a poor choice in animation styles. Why not make him scary and yucky like? Why not just rip off some characters from NIMH? The way he looks now, I'm just kinda mad at the announcer for being so mean to the little itsy witsy micey wicey. That little girl at the beginning though? I mean, that's some exorcist shit. It's definitely the direction they should have gone.

If that didn't make you go back and watch that video, I give up.

Second, since when is it a good idea to discuss ANYTHING with Georgia, let alone business or education? Who in their right mind would sit there and say to himself "gee our budget is fucked, our national guard is deployed, we're facing drought and race riots and rising sea levels, but yet half our teenage population won't graduate high school. I SHOULD ASK GEORGIA WHAT TO DO." If anything, that is a reason to vote for the man. Last time I checked, Georgia was actually run by feral pigs that live off hazelnuts and babies, and hate literacy.

Unless of course he's the reason there's some demon arsonist ox out there, burning houses, conjuring tornadoes, and burying people alive in stacks of paper? If that's the case, then let's throw his ass in jail. That Ox, just sitting there, not moving, causing all this horrible shit in Georgia with his evil liberal telepathic brain waves of big government. It's too bad barbecue sucks in Georgia, otherwise there would be enough strong and graceful steaks to feed half of Atlanta.

I'll tell you what we can do. We'll kidnap the rat and the ox, and then we'll give the rat some steroids to make it as big as the ox, and then we'll trap them on top of a DAM, where they will have to battle it to the death, because otherwise we'll kill them both with these electronic gladiator collars we got from California and New York. Only fucking thing either of those states ever did for this country - penal containment. Not something they know a lot about in Georgia.

I'm also pretty sure that Georgia just declared war on the President of the United States, like open sedition and shit. Is that smart, do you think? I heard he has a lot of weapons like, I don't know, legitimate elected official smart ass-ness.

It'll be a tough battle, since that ox is stronger than a snake, a weasel, and a dead guy combined. Booyah. So I guess the rat will have to use, like, a gun or whiskey or a populist vote to bring him down. Maybe the rat can make a lolz cat out of him, and the lolz cat will come alive, and bring all it's young ipod having you tube watching friends, and then the dam will collapse and everyone will die. But no one will notice, because Georgia doesn't really exist in any kind of influential or "real" sense.

John Oxendine 2010. Strong. Graceful. Named after an addictive narcotic.

I'm sorry Georgia, I don't really dislike you. But you have to admit, this guy went through your school system. Which would actually be a more effective argument against the giant rat.