My thoughts today about whether I should try going vegetarian for a little bit or not:
I have to go to the grocery store and this time I have to figure out what I'm getting before I go.
Meat is expensive.
My gym membership came out today, leaving my budget for the next week 40 dollars less than I thought, which is going to suck.
Obviously I should just not go out for the next week and I should go to the gym every night anyway, except for the show Tuesday which is already paid for.
So I just won't drink. I liked it when I wasn't drinking in January, why did I stop that? Oh yeah, cause I started seeing boys again.
Being healthy and being single is totally impossible. Unless I start running marathons.
Fuck marathons, seriously.
I need to get my bike fixed.
Bike boys are so annoyingly into not doing things that aren't biking.
I also liked not eating bread.
Maybe I'll just buy a bunch of spinach and eat only that for the next week. I wonder if I could actually do that. Raw spinach.
It's so nice out. I bet since it never froze over, the lake will get warm really quickly.
(quick zone out, thinking about being at the lake, with the warm sand and the cold water and the far away horizon and the awesome skyline and sunlight oh god hurry the fuck up)
There was that thing someone put on facebook about people who eat lots of red meat dying 18% faster than other people. I think, I didn't actually read it, just the byline.
Shit, I get so grumpy without meat though.
I mean actually, I get grumpy without alcohol or other ways to get fucked up.
Wait, that's not really true. I get grumpy without sugar.
I just get less creative without getting fucked up.
I fucking hate Kerouac. This is his fault. That movie looks awful. None of them look assholish enough. Kristen Stewart is the worst. Why does Carey like her? She looks like a puritan, all tight lipped. I refuse to believe there is any moisture in her at all, let alone sex moisture.
Giving up sugar is the worst, maybe I could just get a bunch of pineapple and spinach, that's sugar.
You know, cows and things like that only eat plants, but they get all fat and slow. So why do we think herbivores are so healthy?
No, I mean, really they get fat cause of all the corn.
And we don't eat a lot of predators. Predators eat only meat and we don't eat predators, we are predators and therefore we eat herbivores. If eating a lot of meat was good for you, we would eat more predators.
Herbivores are so slow and stupid though, they're not smart. If I act like a herbivore, maybe it will make me slow and stupid too. Maybe my meat oriented predator body chemistry will lose it's edge.
Ugh, maybe it will make me nice.
Right, cause I'm so edgy now.
Fucking corn is the root of all evil. Discovering the Western Hemisphere was just bad for everyone all around wasn't it?
Okay, so if I'm going to try this all again, I should try to quit smoking again right?
Seriously, quitting drinking and bread and eating nothing but spinach and pineapple totally appeals to me, until you tell me to quit smoking.
Nina hates this Spoon song.
I can't believe it's still light out.
Being a predator is hard.
Also chicken and tuna are so gross.
Seeing those worms in that swordfish totally turned me off eating anything from the ocean.
And birds are like rape monsters. Rape monsters who stay warm in their own shit.
No wonder we are predators, fish and birds and cows and deer are so stupid and filthy.
At least predators know how to clean themselves.
I wonder if I could go vegan, since all this stuff disgusts me anyway. It's like, I'm thinking about cheese and cheese is totally gross, when I think about, only I just never do. Also I know this gross out will go away. I wish my body would just decide for real what grosses it out and stick with it. Like, right now, anything I could put in my mouth right now sounds like the worst thing ever. I wish I could freeze this moment right here, and just starve away.
Putting stuff in your body is gross.
I don't want to be a herbivore or a predator, I want to be a rock, can't I just crystallize myself?
The ultimate cheap diet - crystallization.
Maybe the ultimate evolution of the predator superiority complex is veganism, because those filthy stupid beasts aren't worthy enough to be ingested by us.
I bet you could totally sell veganism as a lifestyle/religion that way. Instead of this love bullshit.
I mean, we already love predators more inherently, that's why we prefer cats and dogs and babies as pets.
Look how quickly people stopped caring about keeping horses around once we didn't need them anymore.
And if we loved cows so much, we would all keep one right?
Pigs are different though, pigs are just opportunists, they'll eat meat.
Maybe that's why pork has always been so unsettling.
I seriously can't believe they haven't invented a pill to fix all this yet.