Monday, August 9, 2010

Apologizing for Everything is a Habit I Refuse to Pick Up

I am sorry though about the lack of posting. It's been one of those months where all of a sudden, even though only one thing has changed, you find yourself struggling to handle your daily routine. As in, it's an event to take a shower. It's too much to take out the trash. My food has all been hand held, when I eat. I turn off my phone for most of the time, and I can't write anything that doesn't make me sound weak, pathetic, or cruel. So I've been huddled in the air conditioning, reading The Once and Future King to myself, because it's the most unromantic romantic book I could find. I just want to be a sick dog, and find a dark hidden porch to crawl under until I die.

Even if I could write something interesting, the only thing I might have to discuss are the various plot lines of Disney Channel "princess" movies, the ones that aren't really about princesses, but instead about rich girls at boarding school, or pretty girls at summer camp, music students trying to make it big, ect. And that weird show ABC Family show, Make It or Break It, about some gymnast girls training for the Olympics. In which DJ from Full House plays a coach who is anti-sex before marriage, and goes around shaming everyone else about it. It has roughly the same production value as the princess movies, but a really really creepy opening and closing credits. All gray and black, like all the gymnasts are going to die in a horrible bus accident at the end of the show, and the producers know it, but you won't get even a clue until it actually happens. All safe sex and friendship and evil pouty blonde girls till then darlings.

8 comments:

  1. try Good Poems for Hard Times, edited by Garrison Keillor.

    feel better!

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  2. Back in the day we used to sometimes get drunk and watch 7th Heaven. I'm told that The Secret Life of the American Teenager, also on the ABC Family channel, has some 7H connection (maybe the producers? Whatever.) It totally makes sense--the shows have a lot of the same qualities, though SLAT has more (sadly off-camera) sex, always resulting in a pregnancy, of course. I hadn't quite realized that this sort of fare was the norm for the network, though it makes sense.

    Not that this is a post asking for recommendations, but: if you want distraction that will gently prod you to feel sharp and witty, I can't think of many better books that Max Beerbohm's And Even Now. It's the total opposite of the mood you're in, but that's the point. Makes for excellent fall reading if you're not quite up to it now. The linked old paperback edition (with A Christmas Garland as a bonus) is durable and cheap.

    Or you could get really down and read some Philip Larkin.

    (Sort of awkward, but for what it's worth: this total stranger hopes you take care and feel better soon.)

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  3. what a good time to come to new york for a month with your cats! this is the guest bed: http://www.ikea.com/us/en/catalog/products/S19843755

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  4. Here, I'll distract you. Someone sent me this video and I still can't decide how I feel about it. Why don't you just tell me?

    http://vimeo.com/13677529

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  5. max beerbohm is frickin' hilarious.

    this is my favorite story by him... apologies if you've already read... i just start bubbling when someone mentions an author i've actually read:

    http://www.readbookonline.net/readOnLine/427/

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  6. anytime you want to come throw things at me you can that'll probably help or be entertaining.

    also when that last time comes and all the gymnasts die let me know cus I'll watch that

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  7. I hate when daily tasks become so daunting that it takes longer thinking about doing them than actually doing them. It's the worst. Hope you push through soon.

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  8. well i don't have any specific suggestions for getting out of a funk but i DO know what you mean.
    all too well.
    i often find that it's the RARE day when i'm not a whiny melancholy mess and, ironically, those are the days i feel least interested in posting.
    personally, i don't think there is anything wrong with bitching and moaning on your blog. if that's how you're feeling then so be it. if for nothing else it will help weed out those who never really appreciated you for the entire package to begin with.
    self-help-y preachiness: OVER.

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Who wants to fuck the Editors?